せっかくのゴールデンウィークなので、一泊で温泉に行ってきた。
妻の鬱病の状態からすると、旅行はちょっとハードルが高いのだが、最近少しずつ外出できるようになってきているので、たぶん行けるだろうと２人で話し合って決めた。外出や外泊が不安だが、旅行自体は楽しみにしているようだった。
出発の朝。案の定、妻の状態が悪い。外出のプレッシャーがストレスらしく、どんどん機嫌が悪くなっていく。娘が自分で準備しようとしないこともムカつくらしく、一々私に罵声を浴びせていた。一時は「ドタキャン」も頭をよぎったが、何とか出発できた。本当に外出前は気を付けないといけない。
今回の旅行はゆっくりするのが目的だったので、あまり観光地などにはいかず、ほとんど旅館でゆっくりと過ごした。妻も満足そうだった。
夜、娘を寝かしつけてから、二人で酒を飲んでいたのだが、いつのまにか絡み酒。昔の事件とか嫌だったこととかを蒸し返し、罵り始めた。そして「出ていけ！」だって。旅館だぞ。どこ行けばいいんだよ。
キレてしまって埒が明かないので、とりあえず部屋を出て大浴場へ。２４時間入れるので助かった。しばらく時間を潰して、脱衣所にあるマッサージソファで待機。ようやく妻からメールがきて、無事に部屋に戻ることができた。
この事件以外は、旅行中のDVは無く、妻の鬱症状も悪くなかったと思う。久しぶりの旅行は楽しめたし、妻も満足そうだった。
それなのに、帰宅後・・・。
旅行の疲れが出たのか、妻は一気に不機嫌になった。そして私に一言。
「旅行中は我慢してやったんだ。旅行は終わったんだから、もう調子に乗るなよ？」
GW旅行｜鬱とDV
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